Can we talk about Mean Girls?

meangirlsCome on ladies, we all know them, knew them or are them and don’t realize it.  They might be our neighbors or our co-workers. They lurk in our schools and in our churches. It’s a topic that has recently made headlines and forged anti-bullying campaigns, but the issue is never resolved. Yes, I’m talking about those mean girls. The ones who put our bras in the freezer at 6th grade sleepovers. The ones who rallied the innocent onlookers against us at the middle school talent show. I will be so bold to say that if you have never been the target of a mean girl it’s because you were not considered a threat or (wait for it……) you are one.

For some “moth-to-the-flame” reason people are strangely drawn to the dynamics of mean girl-ness. Countless movies, day-time dramas and primetime tv shows have all succumbed to the allure of the mean girl. Even Disney, with its plethora of princesses requires a mean girl to take the fall so good can prevail. We unconsciously glorify the mean girl for her cleverness and tenacity, and even though she usually loses in the end, she seems to have a lot of fun doing it.

If we are a society that rewards good behavior and supposedly cheers for the underdog, then where do all of these mean girls come from? In my opinion, little “mean girls” grow up to be big “mean girls” and then have babies and parent them into “mean girl-ness.” It’s a vicious cycle. Perhaps the hamster wheel continues to spin because the mean girls are completely clueless to the power and pain they wield (um…not really).   I mean, generations of woman before them have been raising “mean girls” so that what is considered bullying to the majority of society is just normal family dynamics for the “mean girl.”

Perhaps I’m spewing dispersions from the judgment machine, but I believe mean girls begat mean girls. Perhaps the cycle would end if anti-bullying campaigns were directed to the mothers instead of the daughters. Instead of having workshops for middle school kids, parent/teacher groups should offer mandatory classes for the mothers. Mandatory because the offender-mothers would never in a million years believe that were guilty of such behavior.  You know the type… the ones who use phrases like “bless her heart” to sugar coat the ugly things they say about people behind their backs.

Am I right? Don’t we all know that mom who would do “anything” to see her child get an edge at the expense of other children?  They see their actions as those of a loving, dedicated parent, not that of the bully that they truly are.  These women pop up on the soccer fields, the dance studios, the gymnasiums.  And they don’t just defend their daughters.  These women can single-handedly destroy the social life of a middle school boy in the blink of an eye all in the name of “protecting” others from sketchy families. 

I don’t pretend to have the solution the problem, but I’m not the only one to support this “scientific” theory (see video below).  It appears that my theory on mean girl evolution is getting some traction in the scientific community.  It’s definitely worth the watch.

Uh oh!  Did you just  hear that?  That  was the sound of me falling off of my soapbox.

About Goddess Arriving

Welcome to Goddess Arriving! I'm a 52 year old mother of three budding goddesses, grad student, runner and seeker of all things spiritual. This blog is my "white space" to speak my truth and explore ways to live well and age with grace and wisdom.

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