Even though my three daughters refuse to acknowledge my impending half-century celebration, I am proud to say that I will be 50 years old on Sunday. Apparently to the teenage set, having a mom who is 50 is a stain on their social status. Whatever… I am healthy, I am grounded and I am fairly well-preserved; therefore, I am grateful.
But turning 50, in my opinion, requires a little “life review” of sorts. So here it goes…Susan’s Top Ten Things I’ve learned thus far:
1) You are only as good a parent as you were parented OR as good a parent as the books you choose to read to become a better parent. Kids don’t come with an instruction manual, but LOVE, patience, and the library can fill the gap.
2) Forgiveness is the key to happiness. Forgive yourself, forgive your parents, forgive your family, forgive your Ex. Anger and resentment are a prison, forgiveness sets YOU free.
3) Try to see the Divine Spark in the eyes of all people. When you realize that everyone, including yourself, has the light of God in them, you understand that we are all connected; connected to that crabby neighbor, connected to your bossy mother-in-law, connected to your demanding boss. Making this connection results in compassion, and compassion allows us to love unconditionally.
4) Best Girlfriends are a priceless gift. There is something miraculous that happens in a circle of close women. There is a bonding and a nurturing that is born that distance cannot weaken and time cannot fade. If you are blessed with a few close friends in your lifetime, you are blessed beyond measure.
5) Listen to your gut. It’s called your intuition and women, especially, have a keen awareness of it but turn it off because they think their brains know better. Stop it! Your intuition is your connection to your Higher Self which truly does know better than you. In other words, that little voice inside of you telling you that “this guy is a jerk” shouldn’t have to scream it for you to listen. (I learned this lesson the hard way, btw)
6) Beauty truly radiates from the inside out. No make-up, hair dye, or tanning salon can create beauty; they just mask our divinely created humanity. Beauty is that sparkle in your eyes when you believe in yourself. It’s that dazzling smile when you share your soul. It’s the glow on your cheeks when you feel connected to another. It’s the gentleness in your voice when you comfort a friend. It’s in your healing touch when care for a loved one. That is beauty. Believe it, own it.
7) There is fine line between confidence and cockiness. Confidence is sexy; cockiness is arrogant. Don’t cross the line…or make sure you have a best friend who will call you on it.
8) God’s time is not our time and time is just an illusion of our three-dimensional world. What does this mean for me you ask? Well it means that just because you want something now doesn’t mean you are ready for it now and patience and trust are required. Another hard lesson for me to learn. I know the phrase is a bit over used, but “Let Go and Let God” truly is a rule that I have lived by now for 25 years and I have been greatly blessed.
9) People just want to be SEEN and HEARD. Not in PEOPLE magazine; not under the paparazzi camera lights. They want to know that they have a connection with another human being. They want you to see their soul, their true essence. We all just want that God Spark connection because that’s why we are here. We are here to love each other, to be the arms and legs of the Holy Spirit, to be co-creators with God.
And Susan’s Tenth Thing She Has Learned at 50….drumroll please….
10) You Are Worthy! I’ve spent most of my life, well 49 years anyway, thinking I didn’t deserve real love, that I was so flawed and imperfect that if anyone knew the real me they wouldn’t love me. I let the scars of my childhood define me. I was damaged goods and had too much baggage. But in the last year I’ve realized that a perfect God does not create imperfectly. I am a daughter of the Holy Spirit and because God lives in me, to feel unworthy is a smack in the face of our Creator. I am worthy of unconditional love, abundant miracles, and grace-filled perfection.